The Joe List
As of March 2023
My good friend Joe also lives in San Juan. Joe and I have been to many restaurants together, and after every meal, we completely disagree on whether it was good. After years of debate and trying to change each other’s minds about what makes a restaurant great, we have finally come to terms with the fact that we just we have opposite tastes in restaurants. This made me realize that there might actually be an entire group of Joes out there that my lists will be useless for. As an alternative, The Joe List was born. The crux of The Joe List is that the food itself is not by far the main criteria for a Special Joe Pick - Joe cares the most about ambiance, cocktail programs, ability to easily bring a big group, vibes for a date, and dessert. As long as there are enough things he likes on the menu, he will optimize for everything else. I present: The Joe List.
Disclaimer: I do not endorse (and have not tried most of) Joe’s list and Joe does not endorse mine!
Joe is adamant that 1919 is the best restaurant in Puerto Rico and would give it one Michelin Star if it was up to him :) Joe loves the food and that there is a level one and a level two sommelier and has one of the top two wine collections in PR. He also likes the details like the plates and the amuse bouches. Nine out of ten times that I do a tasting menu I end up being disappointed / would have rather eaten pizza, so I haven’t tried it.
1. *Special Joe Pick*
1919
2. *Special Joe Pick*
Positivo at The Ritz Reserve
Joe loves Positivo at the Ritz Reserve in Dorado. It’s one of his favorites because it overlooks the ocean and you can sit in love seats at the bar and cuddle while eating sushi. The cozy seats are for two people, and also have holders for food and drinks. While I’ve never been, according to Joe, this part takes it from a 8/9 to a 10/10.
3. *Special Joe Pick*
Bottega
Joe insists I need to go to Bottega specifically to sit on the couches and order the Calamari, fried chillo, French’s fries, and any of the three mousses (especially chocolate if they have it). I have not been.
Joe loves El Asador in VSJ for an easy to get into res, and an amazing ambiance in an old building with al fresco dining available. He recommends the Tuna Steak in their signature Mango Sauce. I have not been.
4. *Special Joe Pick*
El Asador in VSJ
5. *Special Joe Pick*
Grazie Pizza at La Marqueta
Joe swears by the pizza dough made by Luigi at Grazie Pizza, and thinks it’s the best on the island. Luigi is the same chef behind the two great Pimentón locations (my favorites is the one in the gas station). Joe recommends trying the Neapolitan, which is always a great way to test a pizza spot.
I’ve never been, but Santisimo at El Convento is high up on Joe’s list. It’s located in a convent converted into a hotel which sets a cool ambiance. Across the street is the oldest church in the USA, the Ceterdral de San Juan Bautista. I have not been.
6. *Special Joe Pick*
Santisimo
7. *Special Joe Pick*
Numero Uno
Numero Uno is the only venue to hang out and eat in Ocean Park, and it’s also on my lunch list. You can spend all day there on the bean bag chairs eating, drinking, and watching the kite surfers in the ocean. My favorite things there are the wings (regular or cauliflower), the quesadilla, and the samosas, but my friends love the breakfast sandwich (Special Joe Pick) and the beef kabobs.
8. *Special Joe Pick*
Marmalade
Joe’s been to Marmalade many times. The main reasons he loves it is because it’s the best vegan options in all of PR (since the chef’s wife is vegan) and that it’s on Fortaleza street which is one of his favorite streets since it’s so beautiful. He loves it as a good pick for a nice dinner and a romantic stroll in VSJ.